He was named, "Muscle," by his oldest cousin, Taylor before he was even born. Who would have known it would be so self-fulfilling.
Above: doing pullups and showing off his muscle car tattoo.
Above: A spider tattoo...his alter ego. He's sucking his gut in to look tough.
Above: Another in the 52 Weeks Series. Credit to Choua, again.
It's been three full years since you blessed my life with your arrival. I remember it like it was this morning. I love you the best!
{{Insert Picture}}
I am so torn right now. I don't know what I want to do, photographically. I don't even know if I want to go into business, formally. I truly feel like newborn and maternity are my calling, but I also love wedding, which I have not yet done. Lately, I've been thinking about seniors too, but again have not tried it yet. I feel like such a mess right now regarding my photographic goals. I suppose I have time though...forever, right?
Feeling saner today. I have to admit, I'm a bit overwhelmed. Time for a vacation. Thank God! In just over a week, we'll be in Florida. Sigh...too bad I'll be working for most of it.
This photo puts me in a fun state of mind for some odd reason. 
It was a cool weather weekend. We didn't mind so much. We still got the opportunity to get outside. The weekend started with a dinner out at Uncle Julios where Roan got to watch tortillas in the making and was given a ball of dough to play with.
We've had a couple of weeks now, in which Roan has not been 100% well..."well". This weekend was very different. It's as if the stars aligned he just was in a groove. He has been such a happy, chatty, engaged, and good listener. He's been singing a lot. I think it's so cute how he sings so passionately, but very out of tune.
It's funny how as a parent, I am constantly trying to figure out what causes my child's behavior and mood to change so drastically. Is it his diet? ...did he get enough sleep? ...or even if my mood has affected his? I finally realized that maybe it had to do with the fact that Choua is at a new job and our roles have changed. I guess it was just a transition for him. We are getting used to a new norm.
Back to our weekend. Roan and I woke up and while I was getting us packed, Roan watched Transformer cartoons on Youtube. He asks for "Spiderman, Transformer cartoon computer".
Then we headed to see the new exhibit at the Morton Arboretum, "Giant Insects". Roan loved it! He excitedly ran from one exhibit to the next. I love how his little legs move so fast when he's running.
This one was his favorite. It's a daddy long legs. He kept calling most of the insects spiders, even though we technically didn't even see a spider. What we learned is that what really separates spiders is that they have venom. Therefore, a daddy long legs is not really a spider.
We lunched at the arboretum, but for dinner we ate a home cooked meal. We've also been working with Roan on eating what we eat. He fights us, but now that he understands us, we can negotiate with him. I also wanted to document that he is no longer eating in a booster chair. He wanted out of it so we now use phone books to prop him up higher.
Sunday was a cleanup day. I asked Choua to take some pictures of Roan and me for the 52 week project. I told him my vision and asked him to shoot away. These were the best ones. I love how they turned out.
A few weeks ago, I confessed that maybe Spring was my secret favorite season. However, now I remember why Autumn holds that spot. I get severe allergies in Spring. I am drugged up...too bad it's none of the good stuff.
I'm putting myself out there. Someone once said to me that when she turned 30 (I was 25 when she told me this and I stupidly thought that 30 was so much older than I was--rolling eyes at self), she suddenly started to love herself more. I have to honestly say that I've been in my 30's for three years now and I am almost as unsure of myself as I was when I was 25.
The only things I'm sure of are the things that make me question myself more. Being a wife and mother have really made me look at life through different eyes and asking similar questions about myself--the one I want to be--vs. the one that I honestly know that I can be. Of course, it doesn't help that I grew up in a family where perfection was encouraged.
I have this inner discussion with myself daily about accepting that I can't do everything and then I end up mad at myself for not being able to do it all. All it takes for me to realize what's most important is waking up to the sound of your child sleep-laughing loudly from the baby monitor as you feel your husband nestled against your back.
And so now the age old question: does it really matter that I can't keep it together 100% of the time?
I do have to take a moment to mark this down in my personal journey. Last evening, after slight encouragement from my husband, I ran. In fact, I didn't only run...I ran 34 minutes straight. Some of it, I'm sure, was at fast walking pace, but I don't care! I did it! I think it was almost 3 miles. I felt so good. Tomorrow, I plan to run for 36 minutes, which should be 3 miles at a pretty slow pace. I haven't done this in years!
Below: Me...using wrapping paper as my backdrop. Try it...you know you've got tons of it laying around the house. I used self-timer so it's out of focus.
